Thursday, May 17, 2007

palestine: hamas worse than israel

Israel bombed Hamas targets in Gaza today - good! Maybe they can do the same job on the Hamas killers as they did on Hisbolla in Lebanon.

Hamas is like the 'Salvation Army' - a bunch of religious nutters trying to get credibility by being 'do gooders' so they can sucker the weak and vulnerable into joining their crazy cult, which is almost as insane as 'Scientology'.

Hamas suffers from a fairly common sexual problem; 'rocket envy' (in this case with Israel). This is the macho warmonger equivalent of penis envy. Unfortunately all Hamas can come up with is the most pathetic sized rockets - you can get bigger vibrators at any decent sex shop. The morons are so incompetent that the only people they have killed with these 'rockets' are ... Palestinians.

Hamas also runs fairly badly equipped medical centers (imagine the NHS run by the Tories for 20 years) in Palestine. Their supporters always point this out, but laying on a few health centers is the least Hamas should be doing considering how many Palestinian deaths and injuries are the result of their bigoted, racist, misoginist, homophobic, undemocratic and failed policies against the Israelis. The truth is Hamas has brought death and misery to millions of their own people for years.

Now Israel is sending in some troops - probably to defend the poor Palestinian people against the Hamas curse, as well as themselves - which they have every right to do.

There is very little difference between Hamas and the Zionist fanatics - they both need to chill out, and have loads of sex and drugs. This has got to be a better solution than selling both sides large numbers of hand grenades fitted with two second timers as suggested on 'Dust My Broom'.

In fact, as Tony Blair, the Best British Prime Minister Ever, has argued for years, there is only one solution to end the problem in the Middle East: Long live Israel, long live Palestine!


el Tom said...

"There is very little difference between Hamas and the Zionist fanatics - they both need to chill out, and have loads of sex and drugs."

Amen to that.

woodstock jones said...


Quite frankly, I think Gordon Brown ought to feel embarrassed by taking over from Tony Blair. And therefore actually refuse to. The fact that he's going for it, and rather delights in going for it, shows you how little dignity he has, as a man and as a politician. To get there, to the numero-uno chair after all these years in waiting, only because the chap of whom he has been dead envious from the start finally decides to throw him a bone by stepping aside shortly before the party they've been mutually misleading is about to enter the final turn leading to the home humiliating!

If Gordon had any pride (though yeah, what's to be proud of?), he'd be content to continue as Chancellor of the Exchequer and later rest on those laurels, dubious though they may be. Despite some vague ideological resemblances between the bloke currently occupying No. 11 Downing Street and his fictional counterpart in the television drama The Girl in the Café (starring Bill Nighy as the Chancellor's numbers-cruncher), it doesn't take a rocket scientist to conclude that two years as PM are ludicrously insufficient to knock even a superficial dent in the disastrous world-poverty situation with which we are presently faced.

Yes, two years. Seeing as how the main raison d'etre motivating Tony's premature exit is to ensure that it's Gordon and not him who will be biting the bullet of defeat come the general election. To make any kind of mark, and in particular a potentially election-winning one, as top Cabinet dog, GB would need to do something(s) truly, and spectacularly, significant. Such as immediately withdrawing all British troops from Iraq and/or going to Washington for the express purpose of pissing on the White House lawn, in public. Anything short of that (or probably even with it) and you can safely bet everybody's boots on voters, when they next get the chance, sweeping the whole New Labour charade into the political dustbin where it rightly belongs.

How would I vote? Were I not both an American citizen who isn't eligible (or perhaps you prefer 'entitled') to cast ballots in the U.K. and a bona fide outsider who never votes period (it only encourages them, right?). No two ways, bring back the Tories. With Thatcher long gone, how much more badly can they rankle in my left-leaning liberal anarchist guts (or fuck up the country; a country in which I have lived, by the way) than the neo-conservative charlatans masquerading as Labourites who are in power now? Hardly at all, I reckon.

And who as Prime Minister? Why Boris Johnson, of course! Let the rollicking good times roll. What Britain needs is to laugh. As opposed to being (thanks in great part to that asinine 'special relationship' with America under 'dem der' Bushtown Rats) the laughing stock of the international community.

As for ol' Gordon, fugitive refugee from a 'soon to be liberated Scotland' that he is: enjoy your 15+ minutes of paltry fame while they last, buddy. Having made the wrong choice for your future and ours, you don't deserve anything better.