tax crash: assessment deadline extended

Above: schmoo was saved a £100 fine today thanks to the HM Revenue & Customs website crashing down as thousands of people tried to make the official deadline for getting in their 'self assessment' forms in and pay their taxss.

Because of this the wonderful tax people have decided to extend the deadline by 24 hours!

Here at the schmoo 'safe house', being keen tax payers (as long as we don't pay what we don't owe), we've been up all night fiddling with the brilliant spreadsheet application available free in 'Google Docs', and looking for lost receipts, bus tickets, anything ...

At 8 in the morning we rang the tax office to plea for a extension. They were very nice but said the deadline was "Set in Stone" and there was nothing they could do. But not long later their site went down ... thank you who ever pulled the plug.

• Last year schmoo had loads of problems filling in the tax forms being dyslexic and semi autistic, not to mention totally slack like Peter Hain. However the tax people were really helpful. We ended up paying almost nothing, despite the price of all those cruise missiles they brought for us to shoot at nasty non UK tax payers.

the conway con: tories do sleeze better

No matter how hard New Labour tries to do sleaze and be seen as the party of corrupt, money grabbing, 'big business', they always end up looking slack and incompetent in comparison to members of the Tory Party who have double dealing, day light robbery, and sleaziness written into their genetic code.

Peter Hain, the anti apartheid hero, and now ex Labour cabinet minister, recently put in a fairly good effort with his weird 'think tank' which turns out to be totally thoughtless. But his inept money management was hardly the Great Train robbery the anti Labour press, and some bloggers who should know better, have been making out.

Disappointingly, like the French 'rogue trader of the century', it seems Peter Hain was motivated by ego, and did not pocket a penny of the £100 grand in question for himself. What a let down! This is not sleaze; it's just slack.

It looked like Alan Johnson might have been in the running with a 'copy cat' Labour sleaze attempt, but it turns out to be just for a measly £3000, and he even had all his paperwork together. Another big let down; he can't even manage to be slack.

doing the conway con

But now top Tory MP Derek Conway is showing how the professionals do real hard core sleaze; pay your son about 20 times the minimum wage to do absolutely nothing, using tax payers money, and lie about it (allegedly). Now that is sleaze. The police have been called to the Parliament crack house yet again, but for once it won't be a false alarm.

Not surprisingly 'decisive' David Cameron did not have to think long before removing the Tory whip from Conway; after all it was Derek Conway who masterminded David Davis's campaign against Camercon in the Tory Leadership election.

• Tory MP arrested for assaulting his own kids.

• Eco Con: 'Bike rider' Tory leader David Cameron claimed more than £1,000 in taxi bills from the taxpayer in 2006. The claim was one of the highest made by any of Westminster's 646 MPs. The highest claim, of nearly £5000, was by a 'liberal'.

• Conway son threw 'F**k off I'm rich party'।

• Derek Conway To Stand Down as MP

state of the union: bush talks to the nation

Apparently Bush wants to work in the baseball industry after he quits as president - but no one is answering his phone calls.

In his 'Lowering the State of the Union' speech Bush threatened "We must take action now" - that is worrying.

He said "We must create new markets" - oh no, does that mean he is going to attack Iran?

• Richard Neville: 'Real State of the Union' speech in full.

robo dealer: cannabis vending machine now in action

Is this the answer to robo cop? Introducing the robo dealer, now on the streets of L.A.

• Meanwhile the (london) Times is running a 'bring back class b letter' from a load of people who want a share of the extra £1 billion this would cost tax payers. Cannabis prohibition: the most expensive mistake in British legal history. Sure there are dangers with cannabis, but the most dangerous thing about cannabis is the law against it.

international orgasms cure for S.A.D.

Above & below: this movie could be a cure for those suffering from S.A.D. The main site has a lot of other cool/hot stuff.

today is Holocaust Memorial Day

Above & below: Holocaust Memorial park bench on the Thames footpath in Richmond, London.

Least we forget: while of course it is right to remember the millions of Jewish victims of the Nazi Genocide, all too often people forget that many of the millions who ended up in the concentration camps were not there for being Jewish - they were there for being gays, gypsies, artists & poets, journalists, disabled people, liberals, communists, socialists, anarchists, and just plain normal.

If there had been bloggers in those days, the nazies would have made sure there was room for them too.

good news: van hoogstraten arrested in zimbabwe

Good news for a change: Van Hoogstraten, the nastiest landlord in Britain, who calls his tenants "scum" has been arrested in Zimbabwe for illegal currency dealings and the possession of pornography.

In the Sixties he was jailed for four years for ordering a hand grenade to be thrown through the window of someone who owed him money. In 2002 he was convicted of manslaughter and sentenced to 10 years in jail after a business associate, Mohammed Raja, was shot and killed by two hired hitmen. He appealed against the conviction, which was overturned in 2003. In 2005 a civil court ordered that Van Hoogstraten pay the murdered man's family £6m in damages.

According to the Guardian he is unlikely to get a prison sentence, but hopefully all his assets in Zimbabwe will now be confiscated by his ex friend President Robert Mugabe. The only down side is that he may spend more time in Brighton where he owns a lot of property, making his tenants lives a misery, boosting employment prospects for his small army of paid thugs, and generally lowering the tone of the neighbourhood.

barack obama: yes we can

Above: Barack Obama wins South Carolina by a landslide with more than double the votes that Hilary & Bill Clinton got. He gave another great speech. Every time he speaks he comes across so much better than Hilary Clinton. Are we being too cynical to think he can't get the White House if he wins the nomination? Is Hilary just another Kerry? She is increasingly looking that way, and she comes with a lot of old baggage, including massive financial backing by the pharmaceutical corporations. There is defiantly a huge surge for change in America. They are sick to death of being ripped off. And like Obama says, they can't afford to wait another four years for a decent heath service and real change.

Here at the schmoo 'safehouse', like billions of others worldwide we are just watching on the sidelines, as they have yet to give us the vote in the 51st state (Britain). We are hoping for the best for the much abused American people, and the best is looking like Obama. It would be fantastic if he was President, because he really would be the President of the United States - not the United Vested Interests.

"Yes We Can" would be the victory of what Barack rightly calls "the most diverse coalition in America for decades."

Being a cynical Londoner however, all schmoo can say right now is "Perhaps they can" and hope for the best. What ever happens we don't want to have to put up with seeing yet another Republican robber president everyday on the BBC. Anything, including Hilary Clinton, is better than that.

• but Bluegal is sounding unusually bitter today, and she probably speaks for a fair few.

• but ... the Kennedy's are backing Obama

gold into lead

A new report by Barclays Capital says that because of 'monoline' deals, which involve insuring against bad debts, the banks need at least $143 billion in fresh capital to cover the losses - but where are they going to get it?

Few people have even heard of 'monolines' even though they are one of the foundations of global capitalism. Basically they are one of banker's favorite alchemical spells for turning lead into gold, having made several pacts with the devil. But now to their horror, the 'gold' is turning back into lead - and then evaporating into massive losses.

• Societe Generale, the French bank at the center of the worlds biggest 'rogue trader' scandal is said to be one of the European banks most exposed to the looming monolines crisis.

us recession: we have not seen anything yet

Fact: The US Postal Service has cut it orders for corrugated shipping boxes due to lack of demand. More analysis of doom.

reject: no more respect for george galloway

Above: Professional big mouth George Galloway is to stand for a seat in the London Assembly in yet another attempt to avoid getting a real job. Sadly he is likely to be successful, as he needs just five per cent of the cross-London vote to take a seat at City Hall. But Galloway may be running out of friends. In recent years he has managed to be thrown out of the Labour Party, thrown out of Respect, thrown out of Parliament, thrown out of the anti war movement and divorced by his wife. The only people who like him seem to be right wing islamofacists who want sharia law in Brick Lane, and relatives of Saddam Hussein. Perhaps his new party should be called 'Reject'.

• To be fair to George Galloway he does deserve some respect for joining schmoo in supporting Ken Livingston for mayor. He also has a good explanation of what he is up to on the guardian 'comment is free' site. Maybe he has learned something from his Respect experience - after all anyone who falls out with the vile SWP and the corrupt 'anti war' movement must have some good in them.

• Galloway is now claiming he has not split from Respect - but this announcement remains on the official Respect website.

guido fawkes exposes himself

Above: westminster gossip blogger guido fawkes on 'News Fright' again last night.

Above: Last time guido was on news night he did not dare show his face, and was shredded by Michael White of the Guardian.

• More guido exposures at Chicken Backup and also at Bloggerheads.

new york times backs hilary clinton

The New York Times joins schmoo in supporting Hilary Clinton: "As Democrats look ahead to the primaries in the biggest states on Feb. 5, The Times’s editorial board strongly recommends that they select Hillary Clinton as their nominee for the 2008 presidential election.... She is the best choice for the Democratic Party as it tries to regain the White House."

• They also said she should chill out on attacking Obama (or he might start crying too).

• Program Your Own Mind commented here a few days ago that "On every poll Obama AND Edwards outstrip Clinton in terms of ability to beat the republican candidates, with McCain being the only Republican that has a hope of winning the Whitehouse".

This may be true at the moment, and here at the schmoo 'safehouse' Obama seems in many ways the more likeable candidate, but things could be very different if he actually wins the nomination and the big right wing media guns turn on him. They will use paid assassins, cruise missiles, poison gas, and even go nuclear. At the moment Fox, CNN etc are supporting him against Clinton.

That's why the more 'experienced' Clinton is the best hope against the Republicans - they have been trying to destroy her for years and they have failed.

george soros: 'worst market crisis for 60 years'

George Soros: "Everything that could go wrong did".

• Mish's Global Economic Trend Analysis is also worth reading for the latest economic twists and writhings, plus Jim Kunstler has a great bit of 'Clusterfuck' analysis.

• Thanks to bartcop one of the best blogs in america for the image.

crowds cheer police on march through london

schmoo checked out the police march today in central london and witnessed amazing scenes as about 20,000 police staged a protest demo march - and were cheered by members of the public all the way to 10 Downing Street.

Perhaps I missed it, but there seemed no sign of the promised 'Boo a Bobby' anti police counter demonstration by the Class War 'anarchists' - possibly because they could not get up in time.

Few would dispute that there is a lot wrong with the quality of policing in this country, despite considerable improvements over the last 20 years.

However a professional police service is required by any society (including an anarchist society), and should be supported by anyone who wants to live in a society free from the tyranny of selfishness and crime.

news of the world anarchists

Too many people call themselves anarchists, but have actually brought into the 'news of the world' version of anarchism which perpetuates an utterly perverted image of anarchy as being violent, chaotic and totally unrealistic, when the exact opposite is true.

Groups like 'Class War' only serve the corrupt forces of oppression by supplying the right wing press with exactly the stereotype cartoon image they require, on a platter (an emailed press release no doubt), to utterly demonise anarchism. The 'Evading Standards' and the 'Daily Malice' love Class War!

Class War's violence very effectively destroyed the anti capitalist 'mayday' movement which at one point had the chance of gaining widespread public support. Now it seems all the so called 'anarchist' movement can do on Mayday is provide the pathetic spectacle of a few dozen people looking like members of the BNP marching at the rear of the annual Trade Union May Day march.

In fact there seems very little difference between Class War and the BNP. As recent 'anti schmoo' comments on Indymedia prove, just like the BNP, these 'News of the World anarchists' hate hippies and liberals, they support cannabis prohibition, and their main political currency is prejudice, hatred and violence. Class War even supports the death penalty! The only slight difference seems to be that while the BNP use Racism, Class War uses Hatism. They have nothing positive to offer.

true anarchists

Those who think that a true anarchist has to be anti police expose their utter ignorance of anarchist political theory and practice. For example during the Spanish Civil War, when a large part of Spain became an anarchist 'state', they even built an anarchist prison to hold arrested fascist criminals, complete with cells painted in 'dadaist' style intended to psychologically weaken the inmates!

It is time that true anarchists rejected the narrow bigotry of these 'News of the World Anarchists' and reclaimed the streets for a real social revolution, which would be supported by millions of people. As any revolutionary should know, a successful revolution requires the support of important sections of society - including the police. This is why true anarchists should take the position of supporting the police instead of making them the enemy, which they are not. The demonisation of the police is a massive red herring allowing the real enemies of freedom to get away scot free.

Of course all freedom loving, progressive people should stand up against corruption and other crimes against society - and one way is to demand a police force free of corruption, incompetence and prejudice. Taking up a self defeating, ridiculous and childish 'anti police' position will never work.

Progressive, freedom loving people need a professional police service on their side, not on the side of oppression and right wing bigotry.

The only way to ensure Human Rights is to ensure the Rule of Law. And that requires a professional, well trained and well paid police service.

• The 'Evading Standards' is 'reporting' on the front page tonight that there were two arrests after about twenty Class War people turned up. Once again the newspaper was only too happy to use the Class War hate bigots to demonise anarchism.

• Why all freedom loving people should support the police.

us election: barack obama comes second in youtube primary vote

BARACK OBAMA's recent 34-minute address from Ebenezer Baptist Church is currently the second most viewed video on YouTube, beaten by 'Britney Spears and Adnan are OVER!!!!'. He has also been voted the second most "favorited" video, and is getting the second highest number of incoming links.

The trouble is, if Barack Obama wins the Democratic nomination it is highly likely that he will end up second in the Presidential Election, just like on YouTube; that's why CNN & Fox TV are supporting him 24/7 against Clinton.

If Barack gets the nomination as they hope, CNN, Fox & co will turn round and do everything they can to destroy him. That's why the more 'experienced' Clinton is the best hope against the Republicans - they have been trying to destroy her for years and they have failed.

....................

"Some argue that blacks should vote for Clinton because Bill was good to us. That's not true. He did the same thing to us that he did to Monica Lewinsky." - Rev. Jeremiah Wright, pastor at Obama's Chicago church.

Bad joke Rev - did you really mean to imply that Democratic black voters, including yourself, gave Bill Clinton blow jobs? As the always spot on 'Bartcop' notes: "But Pastor Jeremiah, why did you perform oral sex on Bill Clinton? If you're going to make a that charge - you need to show us your blue dress".

However well he talks, Barack Obama is the best candidate the Democrats have - for losing the White House to the Republiklan Party yet again.

how to avoid doing tax returns: VAT free games

Here are some doing tax return avoidence strategies:

• Do all the washing up, remembering to rinse everything.
• Clear out the basement/attic/car boot/under the bed.
• Play the free US 'Election Game' all afternoon.
• Ring up tax office and say you are like Peter Hain and don't have time for paper work.
• Use the Biblical Curse Generator to write a long letter of complaint about everything to Gordon Brown.
• Launder everything, including any spare cash (it could have super bug germs on it).
• Take drugs and go to a prostitute - all VAT tax free thanks to prohibition.
• Waste some time trying to cheer yourself up using the Automatic Flatterer.
• Ring up Top Shop owner Phillip Green and ask him how he avoids paying any tax at all, despite being one of the richest men in Britain, worth an estimated £5 billion.

• Thanks to Dirty Leftie for the 'Election Game' tip, and Pickled Politics for the 'Bible Curse Generator' and 'Automatic Flatterer' links.

'prince of pot' marc emery in plea bargain deal to avoid US extradition

MARC EMERY (pictured right), Vancouver's self-styled 'Prince of Pot', has agreed to a five-year prison term in a plea bargain with the American DEA who have been blackmailing him for years using money laundering and cannabis seed-selling charges.

Facing an extradition hearing on Jan. 21 (now adjourned) and the all-but-certain prospect of being kidnapped by the American authorities to spend the rest of his life in a US 'Gulag' prison cell, Emery has cut a deal with U.S. prosecutors to serve the five year sentence in Canada.

He hopes the deal will also save his two co-accused - Michelle Rainey and Greg Williams. The three were arrested in August 2005 at the request of the United States and charged even though none had ventured south of the border.

If the deal is accepted by the courts in both countries (which is not certain), Emery said he will serve the full term and not be eligible for Canada's lenient get-out-of-jail-early rules.

Above: The case has received massive attention in Canada where the persecution of Emery has back fired on both the Americans and the Canadian government which is seen by many Canadians as giving up Canada's national sovereignty to it's unpopular bully neighbour. There have also been demonstrations in many parts of the world including London.

Above: Britain's 'Cannabis Grandma' supporting Marc Emery in an anti DEA demo outside the American embassy in London.

The level of the Canadian government's hypocrisy is shown by the fact that 'Health Canada' even recommended medical marijuana patients buy their seeds from Emery. From 1998 until his arrest, Emery even paid provincial and federal taxes as a "marijuana seed vendor" totalling nearly $600,000.

In recent coverage the Vancouver Sun strongly criticised the Canadian governments stance:

He is being hounded because of his success. The political landscape has changed dramatically as a result of Emery's politicking for cannabis. Emery challenged a law he disagrees with using exactly the non-violent, democratic processes we urge our children to embrace and of which we are so proud.

But along the way he has angered the anti-drug law-enforcement community - the same gang that insists we must continue an expensive War on Drugs that has failed miserably for more than a quarter century and does more harm than good.

Canadian police grew so frustrated that neither prosecutors nor the courts would lock up Emery and throw away the key, they urged their U.S. counterparts to do the dirty work. And that's what's wrong.

Emery is being handed over to a foreign government for an activity we are loath to prosecute because we don't think it's a major problem. His two associates were charged only as a way of blackmailing him into copping a plea.

It's a scandal.

Emery is being made a scapegoat for an anti-cannabis criminal law that is a monumental failure. In spite of all our pricey efforts during the last 40 years, and all the demonization of marijuana, there is more pot on our streets, more people smoking dope and more damage being done to our communities as a result of the prohibition.

There is a better way and every study from the 1970s Le Dain Commission onward has urged change and legalization.

Regardless of what you think of Emery, he should not be facing an unconscionably long jail term for a victimless, non-violent crime that generates a shrug in his own country. Emery is facing more jail time than corporate criminals who defrauded widows and orphans and longer incarceration than violent offenders who have left their victims dead or in wheelchairs.

And while he has long seemed to court martyrdom, Emery is by no means sanguine about what is happening. He is angry at local lawyers for failing to come up with a viable defence. "They had two years and $90,000 and they came up with nothing," he fumed. "John Conroy called me up and said 'take the deal - Michelle will die in jail. Michelle will die in jail!' What can I say to that?"

Rainey, who has a medical exemption to smoke marijuana, has Crohn's disease. Incarceration in the U.S. would deprive her of her medicine, and she fears it could lead to her death.

"It's an ugly situation but Marc expects miracles," Kirk Tousaw, one of the lawyers involved, told me. "There aren't any here."

He's right. Our extradition law puts Canadian citizens at the mercy of foreign governments and judges can't do much about it. Emery is being forced to accept a deal because not only are two of his friends in jeopardy if he doesn't, but also to go south for an unfair trial would mean serving as much as 20 years in prison, perhaps more.

One of his friends, for example, was handed a 30-year sentence for growing 200 plants. This is wrong.

If Emery has been breaking the law and must be jailed, our justice department should charge him and prosecute him in Canada. It's time for Justice Minister Rob Nicholson to step in and say, sorry, Uncle Sam, not today - not ever."

If only there was even one newspaper in Britain that had the guts to tell the truth like this.

• Apart from being an honest, tax paying 'marijuana seed vendor', Marc Emery is the publisher of Canada's excellent 'Cannabis Culture' magazine.

• Marc Emery on YouTube.

gaza plunged into darkness by hamas

The main power generating plant in the Gaza Strip has been shut down by the Hamas occupiers, plunging more than 800,000 people into darkness. Hamas and it's apologists in the West blame Israel for cutting fuel supplies - but this turns out to be totally untrue.

The truth is that there is plenty of fuel. The truth is that the real darkness in Gaza is the terrorist Hamas organisation which is constantly shooting rockets at innocent civilians in Israel which results in Israel attacking innocent Palestinians. If Hamas stopped the rockets then the peace process could continue and a Palestinian state could finally become a reality. The truth is that the main block to a free Palestine is Hamas.

Long live Palestine - Long Live Israel.

police pay dispute - 'an incompetence'

The government's stupid and unnecessary dispute with the police over a minor pay issue is developing in to an entertaining 'Carry on the Ballshit' farce which could climax this Wednesday with a march by 15,000 police people being banned from marching through Parliament Square - by the police.

Instead, the march will go past the Marsham Street offices of Jacqui Smith, Britain's worst ever female Home Secretary, who said last week she was scared to walk on the streets of London at night.

Meanwhile 'anarchists' plan to join the march as members of the 'Anarchist Police Federation' - as most of these so called 'anarchists' are paid police informers and professional 'agent provocateurs' no doubt they also hope for a pay rise.

One thing is for sure - the government's nit picking decision to renegade on a previous deal with the police and continue this ridiculous dispute is yet another sign that it is 'an incompetence'.

• A study by Cornell University has shown that most incompetent people do not know that they are incompetent.

study shows cannabis increases brain cell growth

Prohibitionist Gordon Brown and his paranoid agoraphobic Home Secretary (who is too scared to walk on the streets of London after dark), seem hell bent on re classifying cannabis as a 'Class B' drug despite all the expert advice offered by the Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs (ACMD).

Classifying cannabis as a 'Class B' drug would cost taxpayers at least £1 Billion a year.

The Independent reports that members of the Advisory Council are furious. Rev Blakeborough, who runs the Kaleidoscope drug abuse charity is quoted: "There is no significantly new evidence to suggest that cannabis is any more harmful than in the last review we did 18 months ago. The only reason that the ACMD is being forced to discuss this matter is because every new Home Secretary seems to want to show how tough they are."

Meanwhile a new study shows that cannabis increases brain cell growth - if this is true, instead of prohibition perhaps the government should offer 'Free School Spliffs' .

The only way to protect the health of the nation, which is the duty of any government, is to legalise cannabis and regulate it's sale like any other product. Anything else puts the sale and distribution of a product used by millions of people in the hands of gangsters and criminals.

radical fish lips theory

Above & below: On the fish counter at Waitrose. It is well known that lips tell a lot about a persons character and state of mind - perhaps we can get the same information from the lips of fish, which are the most human part of a fish. If true, fish eaters could decide if they want to eat a nice fish - or a bastard.

ideal home: mini nuclear reactor by toshiba

Gordon Brown's plans to build up to ten nuclear power stations in Britain connected to a network of high speed electricity budget meters, has set off a frenzy of hand wringing and teeth grinding by envioromentalists in Britain - but precious little else.

Now a new 'threat' looms which is certain to give the eco panic victims even more nightmares; mini nuclear power generators built by Toshiba designed for 'domestic' use will be on sale in Britain by 2009.

NextEnergyNews reports: Toshiba has developed a new class of micro size Nuclear Reactors that is designed to power individual apartment buildings or city blocks. The new reactor, which is only 20 feet by 6 feet, could change everything for small remote communities, small businesses or even a group of neighbors who are fed up with the power companies and want more control over their energy needs.

.... but unfortunately this is all just a hoax - otherwise schmoo would be ordering one now to be liberated from the Budget Meter for ever.

in the end everything must go

Above: capitalism wins again with special offer on violent revolutionary.

we love cops: support the police march, 23 Jan

15,000 off duty policemen from all over Britain are set to stage a protest march through central London, organised by the Police Federation, on Wednesday 23 Jan.

The police people, who are protesting against a disappointing pay offer from the government, which renegaded on a previous deal, will march from Park Lane to Millbank, assembling 10:30, moving off 11:30, finishing at 15:00.

Apparently some idiots do not support the police, and plan a juvenile 'Boo a Bobby' counter demonstration outside the Home Office. Police may be required.

Here at the schmoo safe house we support the police 100% in their struggle; we love and respect the cops.

All freedom loving people should support the police because:

1. Crime is one of the greatest forms of oppression and especially effects poorer sections of society who deserve to be protected. We need the police to do this difficult task, they should be very well paid and given all the resources required to do the job.

2. Upholding the Rule of Law is the only way to ensure even a modicum of justice. We need the police to protect society from tyranny.

3. Such is the nature of the world that if the institutions, business's and individuals in a freedom loving society are not protected they will be robbed, raped and pillaged by the enemies of freedom; selfish bastards, corrupt corporations & eco criminals. We need the police to stop the people who selfishly just want to take what ever they want by exploiting others, regardless of the consequences.

4. Arguments, accidents, freak outs, lost people, violence in hospitals, and 'domestics' often end up serious enough to require police help and/or intervention. We need the police to be the strong arm of the social services.

5. Murders happen. We need the police to be well trained and well paid, and therefore well prepared, to track down the dangerous and demented souls who for what ever reason, violently target others.

6. Even demonstrations by police people need policing. The sacred right to protest is rightly protected at vast cost to tax payers - by the police. Without a strong police presence at demonstrations, industrial disputes and riots, the freedom to protest would be lost to violent confrontation between opposing fractions. Bully boy tactics and intimidation of members of the public by extremists both left and right can also be prevented thanks to the police.

Better to have police people who are well paid, than even one bent cop. Better to have an efficient professional police force and the rule of law and justice, than mob rule and the rule of gangs and criminal 'war lords'.

Better to have democracy (however flawed), protected and upheld (by the police & ultimately the army), to having bogus 'people's committee's' run by self proclaimed 'revolutionaries' after the collapse of civilised society.

Above: poster for the police march and rally, featuring the current Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith as 'Jacq the Rip off'.

sun editor, nude pictures, union jacks

Above: The parliament channel suddenly became interesting when gorgeous Sun Girl No 1, Rebekah Wade, editor of the best newspaper in Britain, appeared to brighten the proceedings, giving evidence to the House of Lords Communications Committee. What a smasher! This girl must raise union jacks where ever she goes.

Above: While seeming to roll a joint of cannabis, she admitted she liked looking at pictures of naked women. She told a Bishop who raised the issue; "I like Page 3" and complained about being harassed by bitter bully Clare Short, who has campaigned against beautiful naked women for years. She said both male and female Sun readers "loved" the nude pictures of women. When challenged that many people agreed with Clare Short and did not like Page 3 she retorted: "If you want to put on the record that millions of people don't like page three, then I want to put on the record that millions of people do - 7.7 million to be precise." Right on sister! We'd love it if Rebekah appeared on Page 3 that's for sure.

Above: Was that a nice toke? Trying to keep a straight face Rebekah Wade said her boss Rupert Murdoch, the ruler of the world, did not influence editorial decisions and hated the amount of coverage she gives to Big Brother. But interestingly she did say that Murdock called her at 1.30am on the day of the New Hampshire primaries to warn her that the exit polls were wrong (as he had fixed the count). She said she would resign if he asked her to support the Liberal Democrats. What a scorcher! This beautiful British babe could turn winter into summer.

Above: Looks like she is stoned again. In December the Sun's circulation dropped below 3m copies (7.7 million readers), for the first time since 1974, despite cutting its price to 20p in London and the south-east, according to the latest official ABC figures. Although the Sun is now virtually a free sheet, Wade blames the circulation drop on actual free sheets like the 'London Paper' - published by Rupert Murdoch.

• Fact: When Robert Maxwell took over the Mirror newspaper in July 1984 he also took over personal selection of the models for the Mirror's version of 'Page 3' from day one. After Maxwell's disgrace, the Mirror piously gave up 'Page 3', but jumps at any excuse on pages 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10 etc

prophecy 2008: 'global consumer equality'

Above: old track to near future

The dream: With nuclear fusion developed to provide almost free and limitless energy, huge medical/scientific advances, and 'Global Consumer Equality' giving everyone on the planet a basic income, plus housing, education, and heath care, the relatively near future could be incredible:

• Poverty, disease, cold baths, car accidents and even bad TV reception will be a thing of the past. Everyone on the planet will have more than enough money to survive, automatically paid into a bank account every week.

• Life expectancy will be massively increased - some people alive now could live to 300 years old or more. The downside is this may include Bin Laden, Cliff Richard, George Bush, Chavez and even Fidel Castro. They all put on a good show in their time, but in 2008 they are pretty dated; imagine after 300 years?

• 'Space Lifts' will link humanity physically with the universe, allowing cheap import and export of everything from sex slaves, illegal drugs and bibles, to weapons of mass destruction, and blood diamonds from Mars.

• Google's 'FutureSearch' software with allows users to search and edit the future is banned. Then it is unbanned, then it is banned, then it is un banned, and so on for ever.

• A massive prison will be built on the Dark Side of the Moon (originally to replace Guantanamo Bay), but eventually gets turned into a Zen monastery as part of a money laundering scam by President George W. Bush Junior Junior Junior.

• 'Babytooth' computer technology will allow bored babies in the womb waiting to be born to go on-line to play games, chat with their parents, get to know their relatives, open a bank account, shop for toys, and webcam with other other 'pre-birthers'.

• Super strength 'Space Skunk' cannabis will be grown in massive 'grow room' satellites orbiting earth, and will be used extensively especially by politicians, and bored airline pilots.

• There will be a mass market in illegal microchips which people connect to their brains to produce 24/48/64 hour pre programmed 'trips' while they lie unconscious in darkened rooms connected to drip feeds. 'Class A' chips will include the horribly realistic 84 hour 'suicide' trip.

• Using human language recognition software dolphins will be given gainful employment as 'call center' operators, using dolphin technology radio links. Later it will be discovered that dolphins have especially good software programming abilities leading to a rewrite of Winmac v 2060 enabling verbal communication with all pets including tortoises and spiders, who take over the call center industry.

• Food machines will produce any dish within half an hour by manipulating molecules taken from garden earth. Early models will require several kilos of earth to be deposited in the machine each day to feed a family. These will be superseded by 'molecule growers' known as 'Tescos', which require no deposits what so ever (except payment deposits). Hacked' versions will be used to create illegal drugs and banned weapons. Eventually 'Tescos' will produce clothing and any required consumer product. Industrial versions will build huge buildings or even bridges in a very short time, and will also be used to build space stations and cities on Mars.

• Eventually humanity hooks up with a nomadic alien intellegent which loves any kind of work humans find boring, plus eating black bags full of domestic rubbish, toxic waste and old bits of plastic; everyone lives happy for ever after.

Everything can be all right. The future could be great.

the economy: skid row britain

Above: Sub prime blues hit bend in economy; reality.

Close the Banks (by schmook)

Close the banks, and repeal the slavery laws,
it's your money and your life.

Close the banks, before they make summer too expensive,
before spring is extinct.

Close the banks, they are a Vampire Death Cult,
Drakula is alive and well, in a branch near you.

Close the banks, and 'abolish capital punishment;
the people have always been punished by capital'.

Close the banks, 'their' capital is our time on earth,
the amassed toil of generations, stolen without pity,
we have enough laundries that don't work.

Close the banks, the Politicians Pimps,
the Multinational Vandals,
the Stooges of the Rate of the Dollar.
They make deals with genocidal murderers.

Close the banks, and open your hearts!
The money has all gone, so join the real economy
and STOP THE CITY.

Close the Banks, this is one debt we owe ourselves.

• Quicktime movie version with 'dub' sound track.

A typical example of what is hitting the banks & the world economy: schmoo just got off the phone with a debt collection agency who had been sending unsolicited threatening mail to the 'safe house'. Seems they purchased the debt of an ex resident from T Mobile who claimed 6 months unpaid contract fees (£100s). I told them they had just purchased a very bad debt: the person involved moved out three years ago - to go live in the Australian bush.

Reproduce this type of bad debt that will never be paid, in every dodgy neighbourhood in the Western world, and that is the problem. The amazing irony is that in some cases the financial corporations who lent the money, ended up buying the very same bad debts.

What we need to do is CLOSE THE BANKS (they are all broke anyway). We need non profit financial institutions dedicated to serving the interests of their customer's, not a load of shareholders.

Nationalise Northern Rock. Nationalise all of them. We need the People's Bank of Britain.

gordon brown hits nuclear button for budget meter britain but fusion is the future

Above: Everything can be all right. The future could be great.

Gordon Brown's recent announcement backing nuclear power could put the recent government £57 billion bail out of Northern Rock look like petty cash. Up to ten stations could be built; that's ten massive electricity bills adding up to billions.

Browns 'high tech' nuclear power stations will create the most expensive electricity bills in British History. Basically they are crude steam engines using heat generated from a nuclear reactor, which creates highly toxic waste that has to be looked after for 250 thousand years.

Interesting that Gordon Brown's brother, Andrew Brown, is head of media relations for the French-owned energy company EDF, the world's largest nuclear operator which announced plans to build four new nuclear power stations in the UK, immediately after the Prime Minister hit the nuclear button.

Meanwhile, everyone in Brown Britain may be forced to use the dreaded 'Budget Meter' by the time the bills are paid. Already used by 'sub primers' all over the country, the 'Budget Meter' cuts off the electricity supply with out mercy when a pre pay key runs out. A good example of 'double think', the 'Budget' meter is in fact the most expensive way of purchasing electricity (but is good in shared hovels to avoid arguments over huge quarterly bills).

However, while while things may look bad now, in a few years Nuclear Fusion is possible and the EDF nuclear stations will be known as 'Brown Elephants'.

With nuclear fusion all our energy troubles could be over. It could even herald an amazing 'Age of Global Consumer Equality'; everyone will have spare cash to burn on crap.

• Sellafield clean up will cost taxpayer 31 billion.

• China backs nuclear fusion project

• stop-wylfa.org/

no smoking anywhere?

Above: The indoor smoking ban has proved to be a huge success - so much so that the French have decided to do the same. However, as this sign in the British countryside shows, sometimes people take things a bit far.